If I Only Knew Then…
November 24, 2009 by Nicole Ibarrondo
Filed under Girl Talk, Pink & Private
I’m not sure if anyone has even noticed, but I’ve been MIA for the last week or so. I kind of hit a bump in the road (which is all paved now) and it allowed me some time to sit and think about the past, the present and the future. This particular instance had to do with my past — made me wonder if I had made all the right decisions, what I could have done differently and what can be done now to change it all. In the end, I realized that I did everything exactly right and I am right where I am supposed to be in life, but living a life of regret, even if just for a week, brought up some really interesting questions.
The one question that helped me out a lot was…
If I could go back in time and give some advice to my younger self, what would it be? What advice would be given to 19-year old Nicole to maybe help her get through the past 10 years a little less confused?
Now, I’m not really the philosophical type, so don’t expect any life-altering moments here, but these are the three things I know now that I wish I had known then.
- Fake it till you make it – Be confident, no matter what! Everyone goes through a little self-doubt at one point or another, but you have to keep on truckin’. This applies to a plethora of things including being confident about you look, how you feel or how you take on the day.
- Your parents are most likely right – I know it’s a hard concept to grasp as a teenager, it kind of feels like your parents are always giving you bullcrap advice, saying what they are supposed to say and not relating to you as a human, but they are. All the self-help books in the world can’t compare to real life experience that your parents have most likely lived through already. Whether they are trying to convince you that you will in fact one day find true love or they stress about how important education is, it’s all true. You don’t even have to let them know you’re listening, but definitely take heed.
- Plan ahead – Again, something that can be used in a multiple of ways, whether it’s putting some money aside for a rainy day, pursuing a degree or staying healthy and fit. I know that when your young it seems like you have your whole life ahead of you, which you do, but with each day that passes, a fraction of that “whole” is coming off. This one I guess is the hardest since it can be difficult to picture yourself in the future, but trust me on this Nicole, you’ll get there soon enough.
So tell me, what would you tell your 19-year old self? Feel free to leave a comment below or blog about it on your own site. I’d love to hear what you wish you had known then…
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Good points! At that age, I would have told myself that he wasn’t worth it. I had this thing hanging on my wall and it said “I will not be manipulated, used, patronized…and on and on. I wish I still had it, because it really was perfect.
I’d rather regret the things I’ve done, than regret not doing them at all.
Thinking of ya!!
How many ppl say “If I could just go back and do some things a lil different”? I could almost guarantee most of the world has said that at one pt or another. If I could have read this 10 years ago I’m not sure I would have listened then but to read this now, I really would like to believe that if I could go back I would have listened. If I could go back and give myself some advice, I would have told myself that life goals and education is very important because now I pray for some kind of security that I’m not sure I will have. I would have told myself that no one deserves to hurt me and if they tried I should immediately push them out of my life. I would have taught myself to be stronger and have more confidence in myself. Lastly I would have told myself to reject fear, that fear is just hatred towards yourself. With all that said, I would like to thank Nicole for posting this and helping me to teach myself now what I should have taught myself 10 years ago.
Great post Nicole and well said! I agree with everything said here!
Looking back, I’d definitely try not to be so hard on myself or to take things too personally.
Kristy
wow, so what WOULDN’T i tell myself… there is so much that has happened in the last 10 years that i think i would probably lose my 19 year old mind if i knew it all. but one of the most important things for me would probably be the most contraversial points for a mom. i would have told myself to wait to have kids. i honestly wasn’t ready, and have had a ton of undue stress and self confidence issues because of it. don’t get me wrong, there are no regrets because i am a better person to have learned the hard way, but i think i should’ve been more aware of what i was getting into and had alot more growing up to do first. (damn that uneffective birth control…lol)
side note: i LOVE my children dearly, and couldn’t imagine life without them. i just wish i had known how to love them AND myself from the beginning…
I would tell myself, get that full college degree, don’t stop part way then say you’ll go back someday.
Yes, I did notice that you were missing. Don’t do that! I hope everything is ok with you.
In answer to your question, 19 is too late. I was already married. Wait, that sounds bad…